Entropy

Have you ever gone to clean your room and it's so messy that you don't even know which part to start with?  So instead you wait a few weeks, sort of giving up on the whole cleaning process because you can't find any place to begin.  Usually there are a few good options to start with--such as the closet or floor--so that you have space to then throw all the rest of your crap when you decide to tackle the desk and the drawers and the bookshelf.  But I've had times, especially when I go to unpack from college, that I just cannot find one good spot to get started.  And so my things sit as they are for a month and it just gets messier and messier until I'm literally jumping from the entrance of my room to my bed at night.

Much like my heart right now.  I'm feeling attacked by Satan from all angles--so much that I don't even know where to begin the fight and can feel myself just getting overwhelmed and wanting to give up.  I don't know which area to tackle first because while I know there must be a common theme of sin that is at the root of this all, I just haven't figured it out yet.

The second law of thermodynamics (thank you, general chemistry class) is all about entropy.  And it says that unless you put energy into something, it will just get messier with time because systems have the tendency of going from order to disorder (i.e. even dust collects in a room that's not "lived in").  If you don't put energy into your relationship with Christ, it will just become messy.  I haven't had much time for prayer this week and I can feel it affecting my entire self.

I'm exhausted physically and mentally and spiritually.  This was my first week of working full time and going to class and having homework and of course it just so happens that this is also the week that I'm feeling attacked from all sides.  And tomorrow I leave for my first mission trip that I'm beyond nervous for.  I can't wait until this time next week when I can spend my weekend sleeping and praying and catching up on homework.

Lord get me through these next seven days in one piece.