testimony time

The room erupted with laughter and tears this morning as I gave my testimony at the closing of the women's retreat to a room of 55 women, most of whom I had just met.  A testament to God's grace and love and redemption.

Testimonies.  I love them.  It's my favorite part about making new friends in the Church.  "So, what's your life story?" is probably my most frequently asked question when I meet somebody.

And that's exactly what I did this weekend at the retreat.  Listened as handfuls of women shared their personal and emotional journeys with me--while also asking so many follow-up questions that one of my new friends even commented she felt like she was at an interview. Oops?

I love testimonies because while each person's story is so unique, they all share the common thread of Truth.  All weaved by the same Creator.  All bursting with His goodness and forgiveness.

Today I felt a rush of adrenaline sharing my story, microphone in hand as I leaned against the pulpit.  Not only because I love presenting (hello, ex theatre girl over here...), but mostly because I was able to share the entire thing.  It wasn't watered down.  I didn't skip over the hard parts.  I shared it all.  Without shame.  Without guilt.  Without embarrassment. Something that I couldn't have done three months ago.  For the first time, I truly gave my story--my whole story--up to the Lord for His glory.

As I was sharing this testimony, I couldn't help thinking, "Jesus, this.. this moment right here.. is a testimony in and of itself!"

Pieces of my past that brought me such shame and silence six months ago I am now liberated from.

So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed. (John 8:36)

Jesus brought me to a place of not only being freed from the temptation of that sin, but to a place of being freed from the shame of it, as well.

I had handfuls of people come up to me after to comment on certain things or ask for prayer in ways that my story matched theirs and resurfaced hard emotions.  One of the common things I heard over and over was, (and honestly, I hear it almost every time I share my story...) "That is such a GREAT testimony!"

Yes.  Praise be to God.  He literally turned my "darkness" to light. (Psalm 18:28) Thanks to another friend for pointing out to me today my name change!

I smile back, nod and say, "Yes!  He is so good!"  But inside I'm thinking, "But He is not done with me yet!"

My God is not done with me, yet.

Sanctification.

Learning.

Turning more like Him as I seek to know Him more.

I want to say, "Ask me in a year to chat with you one-on-one!  Because I'm sure that I'll have some equally miraculous stories to share!"

I might have shared my testimony today, but it's not over.

Oh no.

This journey has just begun.

Then they cried to the LORD in their trouble,

     and he saved them from their distress.

He brought them out of darkness, the utter darkness,

     and broke away their chains.

Let them give thanks to the LORD for his unfailing love

     and his wonderful deeds for mankind,

for he breaks down gates of bronze

     and cuts through bars of iron.

--Psalm 107:13-16