You Carry Me

This is a poem that I wrote at Rockbridge this year during the Retreat of Silence.  When I wrote it, my vision was that it would later be posted as a blog (I wrote it in my notebook because I didn't have a computer with me at camp), but my friend told me when I shared it with her that it was actually a poem (who knew I could write poetry?!).

Below is a video of me performing it the night after I wrote it at Rockbridge's Open Mic Night.  The beginning of the video is me introducing the poem and explaining how I wrote it as a blog, but later realized that it was actually a poem.  Under the link is the text of the poem.

This is worship.
This is me talking to Jesus.
These were my thoughts during that Retreat of Silence as I sat with Jesus near a small creek.

Video of "You Carry Me" Here!


"You Carry Me"

You carry me,
     Swift in Your current.

I am moving quickly downstream,
Amazed at the distance we cover,
But frightened by this pace all the same.

Sometimes You pull me right over rocks
     that I can't even see--
Not even aware of their existence
     on the bottom of the river.
Undeserved grace.

Other times we take the longer route all the way
     around a rock.
Bending and turning--unsure if You'll keep me
     going straight.  But, unfailing,
     You do every time.
And we continue on our way.
I am grateful for these times when the path
     has not been as easy.
They've produced in me character and hope.
Truly, O Lord, I rejoice in the hard times.
Because when I step away and look at the bigger picture,
     the rocks make Your river perfect.
     They add color and splashing.
     They add beauty and awe to Your Kingdom.
     Bursts of grace and love and Truth.

And then there are those lulls in the current.
The splashes from the rapids cease and
     we move ever-so-slowly.
I am still.  I am silent.  Waiting.
     I am unsure if the pace will pick up.
But one thing I am certain of--
     I am still drifting in Your current.

Even in the dark when I cannot see around me,
And there is a chill in the air,
And the sounds of the night creep into my senses.

Even when I don't know where we're going,
     You carry me, still.
And I trust that Your waters will never deposit me
     on the side of this riverbank.

There have been those times,
     O Lord my God,
When I've tried to swim upstream.
The thrill of pushing against the current,
     water zooming across my face.
I boast in my swimming abilities--
     switching back and forth between strokes
     to show that no matter my methods
     I can go where I want.
Pride.
Arrogance.
As I laugh in the face of danger.

But I grow weary, Jesus.
My arms tire and my legs give out.
And I count myself a fool for believing
     I could swim against Your current.
And not before long, I give up the fight.
I lie limp in Your waters--my arms cease to
     paddle, my legs cease to kick.

Letting go.

And I wonder how long it will be before drowning
     in the abyss.
But the moment I release those muscles I am
     caught up again in Your current.
Going in the right direction--
     YOUR direction.
Your waters never stopped flowing,
     Despite my attempts against You.
     And You so willingly take me back.
So thankful for this amazing grace.

I smile again, glad to be moving with You--
     Even if I am unsure where we're going.

You carry me,
     Swift in Your current.

<3